Joulee the Free Salvage Tesla started on her ocean voyage on 2024-08-20. In spite of frequently checking the Matson web site, it was hard to figure out where she was; they simply reported that she was on the open ocean and due to arrive at her destination port (our island) on 2024-09-30. The agent had suggested that I “call customer service” periodically to get an updated arrival, but they never had any new information. Then the web site reported that she’d landed at The Big Port on an island near (a couple of hundred miles away) from ours. Then… nothing. Until we got the call that she’d landed on our island and had already been sent back to the Big Port. That’s right: we could have gone and picked her up, but since she “wouldn’t start” they sent her hundreds of miles away back to the Big Port without notifying us. Crazy, but… okay. It seemed likely (since she was 100% functional when dropped off) that the only problem was that she needed to be plugged in for a few minutes, but “they don’t have room to do that” on our island.
They said when she got back to the Big Port, they’d plug her in and see what happened, but they didn’t though wouldn’t actually admit it. The only option they gave us was to have her towed (at our expense, of course) to Tesla. Where they plugged her in, and she charged, and worked fine (but of course there were charges for diagnostics and such). Tesla said they couldn’t drive her back to the port, so it was the towing company again ($$$). The towing company let me know when they picked her up, but the only verification that they’d dropped her off was sending me an invoice.
We’re pretty sceptical by now, so we called the towing company and were assured that Joulee was at the port awaiting the next barge to our island. The only problem was, when I used the car’s app to check on her, she claimed to still be at Tesla. So we called Tesla, who also assured us that she had left with the tow truck driver. But it’s weird because the car’s telemetry is very good, and it’s obviously current (even reporting the correct temperature and such).
The moving company is usually very responsive, so we called them, but our guy was out for the day and also didn’t return our call today (most unusual). Joulee still claims she’s at Tesla. Tesla says it must just be out-of-date telemetry (unlikely!). Tesla and the towing company both insist she went to the port. We can’t get answers from Matson (who, if they respond at all, wants to go through our “broker”) or the moving company (the aforementioned broker) who are usually right on top of things.
I’ve tried hard to figure out what could account for all these things. The scenario that makes the most sense to me is that Tesla gave the tow truck driver the wrong car and hasn’t figured it out yet.
Will Joulee ever be found and delivered? And what about the poor sod whose Tesla is about to be shipped to another island? Stay tuned.
—2p